Are you teaching these values to your children?
7 minute read, Written By: Momly
Times are changing. Children in today’s generation are exceptionally smart and clever. They learn quickly and apply their minds with enthusiasm and creativity. They are exposed to technological devices very early. Through that they get introduced to new things and concepts. But in this rapid advancement age, their ability to understand others and connect with them is slowly seeing a fall. Schools are doing their job of teaching them everything that is part of their curriculum but what about these essential core values? These values which, unfortunately, our education doesn’t prescribe in the curriculum are important enough to make your children responsible and successful in their lives.
Are we doing enough to help them learn these values? How to instill these values in them?
Gratitude – They say we create an energy of lack when we constantly highlight our struggles and discontentment. To invite abundance and growth, we should thank and feel content towards the things we have. A feeling of gratitude or being grateful to the things that we have, the environment we are in, and people we are surrounded with is what we should help our children nurture to usher in happiness and luck in their life. Through expressing gratitude, they will learn appreciating things that surround them and be more mindful on the positives.
How to practice gratitude – Write the things you are grateful for in a notebook or a journal. You can do this daily in the morning or before bedtime. Help your child write in their gratitude journal by leading her through example. At first, your child will find it a difficult exercise but gradually they will learn. Maybe you can ask her to write the positive things of the day and once she has listed them, ask her to write ‘THANKS’ against each of them.
Empathy – Empathy is when we put ourselves in others’ shoes. When we respect others’ feelings as our ours and treat them like we want us to be treated, then we have learnt the ins and outs of empathy.
How to teach empathy - Children find it hard to learn empathy if they do not see the people in their circles practicing it. Small things like listening to others wholeheartedly, not judging others, being free of bias, being considerate when someone is going through a difficult time and not hurting others’ feelings are some of the things that we can practice to teach our children about empathy. Also, ask them if someone is bullying them at school or if they are bullying other children. Nip this negative trait right at the bud. Tell them bullying is opposite of empathy and good children are always kind to others.
Persistence – Persistence is when we never give up and keep on trying till we succeed. Getting up after falling and dusting our shoes to walk the extra mile is the quality that our children should learn to survive in this competitive environment.
How to teach persistence – Tell them about life stories where you showed persistence. Give them some challenging tasks or activities and ask them to put their best efforts in excelling them. Read stories on people who despite several odds and failures went ahead to pursue their interests and achieved their goals.
Resilience - Resilience is bouncing back from hard situations. Whether it is grief, personal loss or any other struggle, resilience is what makes us embark on the life journey again. It is very hard to bring back our hearts when it is beaten very hard. Children are tender souls and once they see failure or face any form of struggle, they will recoil themselves and go in their cocoons. Resilience in today’s day and age is a powerful tool to set them on a path of success.
How to practice resilience – Make them understand through stories that every event teaches us some lessons. Even if things do not go as we want them to, we learn a great deal with the experience that they give us. Using that knowledge to walk further in our life is what resilience is. Tell them no matter how hard it feels, we should walk with our head held high and not shrink under the gaze of failure and grief.
Courage – Fear is normal and everyone is bounded by some kind of fear. Some are rational and some are unfounded. Children too face situations which puts them in a spot and paralyzes them with shock and fear. Being scared is not a weakness nor is sharing one’s vulnerabilities. To overcome fear in your children, you need to handhold them in the journey of becoming bold. Tell your children to be brave and face their fears. Teach them problem-solving skills and creative thinking to solve the problems. Encourage them to take more risks by modelling courage and taking risks yourself. Pat their backs at each step so that they can walk further toward their goals. Courage and determination are two sides of the success coin. By teaching them early on, we boost their confidence levels and put their personalities on a road of development.
How to promote courage – Read books which have courage as a theme. Tell them how protagonist approached the fear and managed to slay it. You can also get a personalised book made for them to make them more engaged with the theme.
Parents are role models
Children learn a lot from their parents. The way you behave with others and the words you use set an example for them to follow. To encourage these above values in your children, you need to develop these values in yourself first. Speaking kindly, empathising with others, respecting others’ feelings, and being unfazed with challenges are the things you need to apply in your daily life to lead by example. Give them an environment filled with respect and love, set boundaries and respect the boundaries. Lastly nurture self-care and be kind to yourself by practicing art, exercising, and taking some time to rest so that you can bounce back from the stress and be more connected with your kids.