A Tale of Love and Resilience
3 minute read, Written By: Momly
That Unsettling Silence
The day my son was born was filled with joy, but also with unexpected challenges. After a normal delivery, the silence in the room was deafening—my baby didn't cry. He was quickly taken to the NICU, and my heart shattered as the hours of waiting began. The much-anticipated first moments of skin-to-skin contact were stolen from us, and with them, the rush of happy hormones that kickstarted milk production. I feared I had failed him before our journey together had even begun.
His Latch Dissolved my Fear
When I finally held him in my arms the next day, I learned he had already been fed formula. My fear deepened—would he reject my breastmilk now? I worried that the effort needed to nurse would be too much for his tiny body. But that night, my baby surprised me. With a determination that belied his size, he latched onto me with all his strength, suckling through the night, urging my milk to flow. It was as if he knew that this bond was our lifeline.
Painful Beginnings
The first weeks were a whirlwind of pain, exhaustion, and overwhelming love. No one had told me how much it would hurt, or how relentless the cycle of feeding would be. Every two hours, like clockwork, I had to nurse, or else face the painful swelling of engorgement. Sleep became a distant memory, and each day stretched endlessly before me. But I was not alone. My husband became my rock, helping with burping and comforting our colicky baby when I was too drained to continue.
The Prick of Motherhood Guilt was Hard
Still, the weight of guilt was immense. People criticized my diet, blaming it for our son's colic. The whispers of doubt crept into my mind, making me question everything I was doing. The exhaustion, the relentless feedings, the lack of sleep—it all became too much. But I persevered, holding onto the belief that this was the best I could give him.
New Normal after Resuming Work
Returning to work after six months was another heartache. Leaving my child each day felt like tearing a piece of my soul away. His cries haunted me during meetings, a constant reminder of the distance between us. I pumped milk at the office, determined to keep nourishing him even from afar. This routine became our new normal, a testament to the strength of our bond.
The Decision to Wean Him
After 18 months, I made the difficult decision to wean him. The process was heartbreaking; we both cried for hours, mourning the end of this special connection. But as we moved through it, I found relief and a new kind of peace, knowing we had given each other everything we could.
To all the breastfeeding mothers,
know that you are warriors. This journey is not easy, but it is one of the most powerful gifts you can give your child. Trust in your body and your bond, and remember that you are doing something extraordinary. Even in the hardest moments, you are enough.
(As told by Sriyanka - Momly mom)
